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Hollywood to remake 1986 "Highlander."

Summit Entertainment is bringing back to the big screen the 1986 sci-fi cult hit "Highlander," with "Iron Man" co-writers Art Marcum and Matt Holloway on board to write the script.

The original "Highlander" starred Christopher Lambert, Sean Connery and Clancy Brown as immortal beings battling humans, hunting down one another and collecting more power. Lambert played Scottish swordsman Connor MacLeod, Connery portrayed an Egyptian and Clancy was a barbarian known as the Kurgan. The film -- with its "There can be only one" catch phrase -- spawned four sequels and three television series.

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" There can be only two."

Would You Pick Up This Hitchhiker?

"

A Bucket of Popcorn and Some Anti-Spam Goggles Please

When you think of spam, unless you’re hungry, you’re thinking of unwanted, unsolicited, unbelievably annoying advertisements showing up in your email account. The main reason why they’re spam and not just “ads” is that you don’t expect the ads to show up, or rather, you feel they definitely don’t belong there. When you watch television or surf the net you know when and where ads are “supposed” to pop up, and as much as you may TiVo the commercials and ad-block the web, there’s no protection from the barrage of ads invading our brains at a rate of 3000 per day. To maintain our sanity, we like our ads in controlled environments, impossible when every surface, from restroom walls to subway floors, is jammed with visual spam.

And now, drum roll please, the reigning champion for decades and the ultimate surface for unwanted, unsolicited and unbelievable annoying ads, ladies and gentlemen, coming in at 30 by 70 feet and in digital surround sound, we give you: the silver screen!

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"Holy product placement, Batman!"

RIP, Robert Asprin

RIP, Robert Asprin, science fiction writer and anthologist.
On May 22, 2008, Bob passed away quietly in his home in New Orleans, LA. He had been in good spirits and working on several new projects, and was set to be the Guest of Honor at a major science fiction convention that very weekend. He is survived by his mother, his sister, his daughter and his son, and his cat, Princess, not to mention countless friends and fans and numerous legendary fictional characters. He will be greatly missed.

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"Aahz & Skeeve, Captain Phule, and all the others, we hardly knew you - Asprin will be missed."

Review: 'Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull'

CANNES, FRANCE -- It's the summer's most anticipated film, the latest in a beloved series that's earned $1.2 billion in worldwide ticket sales. Add in a premiere at the most prestigious of international film festivals, and the wonder of "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" is that it avoids being an anticlimax and is entertaining in its own right.

Though the film stars a relaxed and capable Harrison Ford as everyone's favorite intrepid archaeologist and boasts supporting players ranging from Cate Blanchett as a superb villainess to Shia LaBeouf as the inevitable youngster, the real heroes of this film are director Steven Spielberg and the veritable army of superb technicians who turn the film's numerous stunts and special effects into trains that insist on running on time.

Trains are in fact not a bad metaphor for the director's motivations for this fourth Indy effort, the first in 19 years. Just like a model-train hobbyist who enjoys getting more and more expensive equipment as his income level rises, Spielberg clearly got enormous pleasure employing a lifetime's worth of skill and turning out wave after wave of smartly done stunts and effects set pieces.

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"Yup, looking forward to this one!"

'Indiana Jones' and the Rip-offs of Doom

When he debuted in 1981, Indiana Jones was never meant to be a wholly original character. He was a throwback, an homage to the cliffhanger heroes of yesteryear. His appearance and personality owed a debt to everyone from Humphrey Bogart to James Bond. But somehow, from out of those purposely unoriginal seeds, formed something that was unique. And when Hollywood finds something unique -- espeically when it does the kind of business Indiana Jones did -- it gets copied and cloned and ripped off in every way imaginable.
To see just how influential Indiana Jones became, take a look at these pretenders to the bullwhip.

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"There is only ONE Indy - 'nuff said."

Deep Cuts: The Beach Boys

Memorial Day is just around the corner, and that of course means the unofficial start of summer. And what would a summer be without the music of the Beach Boys? It would be crap, that’s what. Everyone knows the biggest hits (and there were a ton of them), but there’s a lot of great material that has gone unnoticed by all but the biggest fans. So here’s ten overlooked classics by the boys from Hawthorne, CA.

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"Interesting choices - a vast difference from the standard 'California Girls' and 'I Get Around'."

Brian Wilson returns to Capitol Records

HOLLYWOOD, Calif. -- He is one of popular music's most deeply revered figures, a legendary writer, producer, arranger and performer of some of the most cherished music in rock history. Indeed, it is no exaggeration to call Brian Wilson one of the most gifted and influential pop composers of the last 50 years.

Wilson announces his return to Capitol Records / EMI, his original label home. Wilson's new studio recording, That Lucky Old Sun, will be released by Capitol/EMI on CD, CD/DVD, limited edition vinyl and digitally.

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"Woo-hoo - Surf's Up!"

Before Burger King went creepy, there was this. Quite possibly the greatest commercial ever made

"Man alive! Rwally you don't see commercials like this anymore..."

18 Things A Grown Man Should Never Have

1. A black eye. Unless the rim hits your face mid-dunk, your peepers should remain unblemished. You're smart enough to talk your way out of any fight you're going to lose.

2. A witty e-mail signature. Quotes and song lyrics should be heard during toasts and karaoke performances, respectively. Don't let your electronic correspondence become the digital version of a motivational poster.

3. An empty refrigerator. Your larder should be amply stocked, your pantry provisioned. Always aim to be ready to create an on-the-fly, three-course dinner for her...along with breakfast in bed.

4. PlayStation thumb. When they're relaxing, grown men can behave like children. But if you devolve long enough to cause calluses or button-shaped bruises, you're assuredly missing out on life.

5. A key chain with a bottle opener. This bauble is both a gauche reminder of your college days and proof that you don't know how to apply leverage using available, impromptu bottle openers: a lighter, the back end of a fork.

6. A lucky shirt. Every shirt is lucky when worn by a man who knows that the harder he works the luckier he'll be.

7. An unstamped passport.

8. Olympic dreams. Exceptions: curling and archery.

9. Less than $20 in his wallet. Fiduciary nudity is negligence. A real man should always carry a business card and enough dough to pick up coffee, bagels, and the Sunday paper without whipping out the plastic.

10. A name for his penis. Even if it's a really clever name.

11. Any beer that costs less than $20 a case. And no exception for the grand-slam 30-pack that crosses that price threshold.

12. The need to quote The Big Lebowski/ Caddyshack/Superbad. Reciting someone else's lines reminds people that you haven't the wit to write your own.

13. A futon. Sure, beds are for sleeping. But such a meager, slouchy spread has never, in the history of sex, inspired a woman to say, "Take me on your futon."

14. Code words for ugly women. Actually, code words for anything.

15. A Nerf hoop in his living room. Keep the adolescent accoutrements where they belong: in the rec room or above the wastebasket in someone else's office.

16. A secret handshake.

17. Drinking glasses with logos. Especially those kitschy McDonald's Hamburglar ones.

18. A recent story with the phrase "So I said to the cop…"

An ex-Jack Sparrow spills on life at the Magic Kingdom

Like everyone, I grew up going to Disneyland. Even as an adult I loved it there and went at least once a month. I was an annual pass holder, though not like the freaky ones you may have heard of. I’d see the park’s characters and think, “It’d be so cool to work here.”
But there was never a character I really wanted to play. I had a role on the television show Veronica Mars and was working at Coco’s when a friend told me Disneyland was casting a Jack Sparrow character. I had already played Jack as a hobby at San Diego’s Comic-Con and the Renaissance Faire.
Thirty-seven actors showed up that day, four of us in costume. Only eight were chosen for the next round. We were told we would be auditioning the next day at Disneyland. They told us we were going to be Disneyland’s first Jack Sparrows.
Disney warned us we were going to have a lot of horny women coming on to us. They were also worried about girls. I heard Disneyland had an Esmeralda from The Hunchback of Notre Dame. She was very flirtatious, and they finally pulled her because men found her too sexually arousing and were acting out.

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"Yo-Ho-Ho and bottle of rum!"

Six Degrees of Paris Hilton: The Global Reach of One Vagina

They say we're no more than six degrees of separation from everyone in the world. So, for instance, you don't know Harrison Ford, but you know a guy, who knows a guy, who knows a guy who knows Harrison Ford.

What you probably haven't heard is that you most likely are no more than six degrees of sex from Paris Hilton's vagina. Pick any random person, and if you dig hard enough you'll find that they had sex with somebody, who had sex with somebody, who had sex with Paris.

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"So this would be SEX degrees of seperation?"

One VERY tasteless chess set...

"Knight takes Bishop - Boom!"

Online game: balance the US budget

American Public Media recently launched Budget Hero—an interactive game that lets people explore the major issues of the election by changing the federal budget to match their stands on issues and their values

Budget Hero tries to bring a level of clarity and simplicity to the federal budget. It is bound to be controversial since the game puts numbers against issues like bringing home troops from Iraq soon or gradually or not at all and providing options on taxes, Social Security and Medicare. American Public Media worked closely with the Congressional Budget Office, GAO and others on the data and devoted months of reporter and researcher time to creating the game.

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"Can't f*** it up any worse than Bush and Congress have already done...."

5 Million-Piece LEGO Boulder Chases Indy, Crashes Into Car

Ah LEGO, how much do we love you? Let me count the ways: five million. The same amount of million multicolored pieces needed to create this solid boulder, as big as the one in Raiders of the Lost Ark. Then get a fake Professor Henry Jones (You call this archaeology?), fake Sallah (Asps. Very dangerous. You go first) and some other dudes to push it to chase a fake Indy down the streets of San Francisco. The result: an instant classic, even without the Hovitos. Let's hope the actual movie is this crazy and preposterous.

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"Bwhahahahaha- I Love it!"

An epidemic of extinctions: Decimation of life on earth

The world's species are declining at a rate "unprecedented since the extinction of the dinosaurs", a census of the animal kingdom has revealed. The Living Planet Index out today shows the devastating impact of humanity as biodiversity has plummeted by almost a third in the 35 years to 2005.

The report, produced by WWF, the Zoological Society of London (ZSL) and the Global Footprint Network, says land species have declined by 25 per cent, marine life by 28 per cent, and freshwater species by 29 per cent.

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"This isn't something renewable - once something is extinct - there's no coming back. Or have you tasted carrier pigeon or dodo or mammoth lately?"

Red Dwarf Toaster Sketch

The BEST toaster sketch ever!



"Ah, you're a waffle man!"

Fan-smegging-Tastic

every smeg in red dwarf smegging history




"SMEG!"

How to Destroy 4,703 Brand-New Cars

It all started about two years ago, when a ship carrying 4,703 shiny new Mazdas nearly sank in the Pacific. The freighter, the Cougar Ace, spent weeks bobbing on the high seas, listing at a severe 60-degree angle, before finally being righted. The mishap created a dilemma: What to do with the cars? They had remained safely strapped down throughout the ordeal -- but no one knew for sure what damage, if any, might be caused by dangling cars at such a steep angle for so long. Might corrosive fluids seep into chambers where they don't belong?

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"I'm thinking - world largest demolition derby!"